So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
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