is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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