just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
