Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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