doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
