bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I have aggressive nipples.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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