Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize