sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
