my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize