rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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