Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like heaven, but drunker
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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