I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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