I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
