I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
