The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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