Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
