i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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