new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
