So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
i think i just lost a toe
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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