I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
