We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Randomize