I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
