Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Of course I have a pirate flag
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize