Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
