I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Randomize