Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
There are leaves in my underwear?
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize