Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Welp...herpes.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
