Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
