His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
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