Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize