In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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