the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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