remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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