We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
True strength comes from lack of pants
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
