Swine flu. Run for my life!
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
