I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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