thus making me awesome and them whores
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
