I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Randomize