you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
