Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
