At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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