Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
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I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
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Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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