Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
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I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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