Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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