Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
