I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I'm really into asian looking animals
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
