The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
