The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
