I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize