This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I think people are normalizing furries
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