Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
