we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
