I'm laying in your front yard are you home
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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